When the most important thing in your life betrays you, where do you go? Everyone has crutches, whether it be a girlfriend, a parent, or an organization. And what happens when that person/thing turns it's back on you or does something that you can't forgive? The feeling is terrible. You feel lost, alone, confused. It's strange how something you hold so dear to your life can become to shameful to think about. If your girlfriend cheats on you (don't worry mine didn't), you feel this complete sense of hopeless. Because when you were hurt or needed anyone, you turned to her. But now that person is the one causing you pain. It's almost unbearable. You look at them and see all the beauty they used to have, all the passion you felt towards them...but at the same time, they are now very ugly. So what do you do? Do you forgive them? Do you cut them loose? Either way, you're unhappy. You can't win. And because of this, you're stuck. When you have to choose between two hurts, which one do you choose?
I was very hurt by people I once thought of as the only people that truly cared about me. And I guess that it's not true. Has anyone truly cared? You might ask this to yourself a lot, because I do. I have ex-best friends and ex-girlfriends, strewn about...all failed in some way. I've had more people betray my trust then keep it. So what do I do, eternal optimist that I am? I keep trusting, only to get hurt again and again and again. That's life though, this series of dissapointments, one after the other. Until, maybe that slight chance that there will be someone or something that truly truly cares and will never let you down like that. That's why we keep going, that's why we get into a new relationships and new friendships, even with that terrible risk looming overhead. Because when you find that person, you are given true pure happiness. I just didn't realize it would happen to me this time.
"Why do we fall down? So that we learn to pick ourselves up again"
-Batman Begins
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